The most important lesson for a funeral service.

I've done words for a long time. I've been around funerals and memorial services for a long time, too. I want to give you a lesson that I am constantly telling myself because I keep forgetting it.  Here's the lesson: people forget what you say.  You can offer the best words, the clearest outline, the … Continue reading The most important lesson for a funeral service.

Honest funeral messages.

A funeral message is a place for respect and for integrity. It’s a place to acknowledge a person’s actual humanness and God’s actual grace. With a heart toward the healing of the family and friends, we can gently describe what we know. Elliot’s daughter found a little peace in the honest description of the dad who abandoned her and the Father who didn’t.

A conversation with kids about death.

I think they were nine and twelve. But I’m terrible with figuring out the ages of kids, and I’ve decided that asking isn’t helpful. Instead, I start listening and start talking and calibrate my vocabulary and concepts to the responses I’m getting.  Thirty feet away, through an open door, a public hallway, and a closed … Continue reading A conversation with kids about death.